A little business...

So, since coming to Germany 6 weeks ago, I have done 10 auditions; 3 for houses/ summer festivals, and 7 for agents. I’ve managed to get 3 on board to send me out on auditions whenever they hear of any...and yet I feel like I haven’t done enough. I don’t know what I thought would happen on this first trip, but I know I hoped against hope to walk away with a fest contract in my hot little hand. Crazy right? A Soprano? Getting Work? I know. 

What’s really nuts, is that things are so casual here. In the states, you have one agent, and you usually sign a contract with them to make everything official. Here, immediately after you sing for someone you got feedback and a yes or no vote, but it usually sounds something like “Great! We’ll be in touch when we hear of something.” What? Will you? Really? Is that it? I’m sure you’ve said the same to 1 million other sopranos, what will make you think of me when auditions come across your desk. This business has a tendency to make people a little neurotic, and I am no exception. I keep finding myself asking: Did I do enough? Was there something more I could have done? I mailed over 350 Agents and houses via snail mail, and email, with follow ups, but still, was there something I missed? Some piece of this puzzle that I overlooked? I know this isn’t a science, and has a lot to do with luck, but I believe that luck is when preparedness meets opportunity. Did I prepare enough so that I could be ready for an opportunity? It’s driving me nuts. 

For example; I have given WAY too much thought to an audition that’s 3 days after I’m scheduled to come back. There’s a part of me that’s saying “You have to do every audition that comes up, even if it means couch surfing for a week and spending even more money to do so!” and another, equally as loud part screaming “Do you really thing that one more audition for yet another agent will make or break you? What’s the point of singing for an agent and then immediately boarding a plane home? I think I know what I’m going to do, but this has been a tug of war in my brain for over a week now. 

Fingers crossed that something comes up... soon! I’ll feel pretty stupid if I head back to the states and then get a call about an audition in Germany like the day I land.